So what prompted this post? I was on a first date last week with a guy I had met online, we had both seen each others photos but not met in person. There I was, sitting in Cafe Hillel on Emek Refaim at 9.10pm on a Monday night (yes he was 10 minutes late – strike one!) and I see my date walk towards the door to enter. Like something in a movie, at the very same time, i saw a good friend of mine walk past, notice me and head to comein and say hi. I somehow managed to quickly shake my head to her to signal for her not to come in and also have a lovely welcoming smile on my face as he walked up to me! Was the date a success? Not at all, i was totally bored and . Did my friend and I have a good laugh about it afterwards – absolutely – ah the fun of first dates!
One of the great challenges of going on a first is deciding where to meet. Will the guy put effort into his decision and suggest somewhere different? Or will it be the usual safe Jerusalem options – meeting somewhere in town or on Emek? I personally prefer to go somewhere different, partly because it shows that the guy has some imagination, but also because I think a first or even a second and third date, is not the best time to bump into someone you know.
We have all done it, spotted someone we know out on what seems like a date. We try subtly to see what the “date” is like, without them noticing. Do you go over and say hi or pretend that you haven’t noticed them? One the one hand, saying hi is the polite friendly thing to do, but it can also be awkward and you can seem nosy! I recently saw a guy friend out on a date in a busy bar on a Saturday night – he clearly did not chose the place for its privacy as it is a popular Anglo hangout. I said hello briefly and then left them to it, I did not want to impose – but should I have stayed and been more friendly?